Picky Eaters
Picky eaters
One of the things I hear so often is that kids will only eat a few foods and refuse everything else. This is more common than you think, but it doesn’t have to be that way forever. While taste buds start to develop while babies are in the mother’s womb and continue to develop over the next few years, it’s never too late to introduce new foods and add to the list of foods that they will eat.
7 tips to help your picky eater:
1. Offer variety includes offering a variety of foods as well as varying the way that each food is prepared or cooked.
a. Food variety: we want to offer our kids many different types of foods to learn what they like and don’t like, as well as expose them to new flavors and textures and help build their palate. A variety of foods also means a variety of nutrition. Offering multiple food groups as well as variety within each food group is key. If you know your kid loves carrots, that’s fantastic. But feeding them carrots as their only vegetable because you know they like it will cause them to get burnt out on carrots and leaves them lacking nutrients that a variety of vegetables would provide. Each food group has their benefits and variety will help make sure they are getting a well-rounded balance of nutrients from their foods.
b. Cooking the same food a different way can create different flavors and textures and your child may like a certain food cooked one way but not another. So if they don’t like steamed broccoli, try it roasted with garlic or pureed into a mash or raw. Just because they don’t like a food one way, doesn’t mean they won’t like it any way.
2. Offer foods, don’t force them. If you force your kids to eat certain foods it can create a negative relationship with those foods.
a. Place a variety of foods on the table, or even on their plate, and encourage (not force) them to try at least one bite of everything served. If they continue to see new foods on their plate without being forced to eat them, they will be more enticed to try them. While some kids need a lot of “encouragement” to try new foods, if they are really fighting you on a certain food, stop pushing it at that meal and try again another time. Repetition is key and so continuing to offer healthy options in addition to the foods you know they will eat at every meal will help encourage them to try new things.
b. We all have days where some foods sound better than others and days we aren’t in the mood for certain foods. The same goes for kids, even those who are too young to fully express this. If your kid doesn’t want a certain food at a certain meal, it may just be that they aren’t in the mood. Don’t force it, just try it again another day.
c. Don’t stop serving a food just because they didn’t try it. It takes time for taste buds to develop and for some kids it takes multiple exposures before they are willing to try a new food. Taste buds change too, so if they don’t like a certain food now, it doesn’t mean they never will.
3. Have realistic expectations. While it would be lovely if we could get our kids to eat a balanced meal at every meal, it’s not realistic. Getting kids to eat the foods we want them to is hard enough, so don’t expect them to eat perfectly at every meal. For younger kids, looking at what they are getting in their diets over an entire week is a better gauge of their overall food intake rather than looking at each individual meal. A variety of healthy foods including protein, healthy fats, and vegetables is the goal, but getting some of all of these foods in over the course of a week is more realistic. I’d rather hear that kids are getting variety in and eating different foods throughout the week rather than the same foods all the time, so don’t stress if they aren’t eating perfectly every day. They may have days where they eat more healthy foods than others and that’s okay. It’s all about balance.
a. Change doesn’t happen overnight. Allow some time for your children to adjust to new foods and new ways of eating. You can’t throw out all of their favorites and expect them to embrace all the new foods you are giving them immediately. Give them time to transition and explore. Serving new foods along with their favorites creates safety for them - knowing that new foods doesn’t mean they have to give up their old favorites, and that there is something on their plate that they like in case they don’t like the new ones at that meal.
4. Focus on what they like and add from there. Offering a mix of new foods and the foods you know they’ll like helps take some of the fear of new foods out of it. By seeing new foods alongside foods they recognize, they will feel more comfortable and willing to try them. If they are presented with a plate full of things they have never seen before, it can feel overwhelming. Offer them at least one thing that they like on their plate and then fill the rest with new foods, or start with one new food alongside many favorites. Finding foods that are similar to the ones they already like can be helpful too. If they love chicken tenders with dipping sauces (like ketchup or BBQ sauce), serve them grilled chicken (cut into pieces similar in size and shape to tenders) with the same dipping sauces. It’s a small change but helps them start developing new tastes and comfort with new textures.
5. Exemplify positive eating habits. Kids learn from the people around them and as parents/caretakers, we are some of the biggest contributors to our kids’ behaviors. When they see us eat healthy foods, they are more inclined to eat healthy foods too. If they never see you eat vegetables (or complain about them when you do), then they are not going to want to eat them either. Showing them that healthy eating can be delicious, fun, and easy is the best way to get them eating healthier. This also includes sitting down for family dinners to show them the importance of sitting down for a meal and focusing on their food (not focusing on screens or other activities while eating). Family dinners are a great way to show your kids healthy eating habits and encourage and cultivate a positive relationship with food.
6. Create a positive relationship with food. Family dinners where your kids see you have a positive relationship with food is a great starting point and offering foods without forcing them helps enforce this too. If meal time becomes a battle or a negative experience for our kids, it can create a negative association with food for them. The more uncomfortable they feel at meal time, the more likely they are to stick to their favored go-to foods because they are comfortable. Getting our kids to step out of their comfort zones is necessary to get them to try new foods, and kids need to feel safe and comfortable to do that. Help create a positive relationship between your kids and food.
a. Let your kids pick out the new foods that they want to try, such as new fruits and vegetables at the grocery store. If your kids pick it out themselves, they are more likely to try it. This also allows them to ease into new foods by picking those that are appealing (rather than intimidating) to them.
b. Involve your kids in the “what’s for dinner?” conversation. If your kid feels like they have a choice in what they eat, they are more likely to eat what they choose. Food is one way that kids often try to exert some control in their lives because they are so many other areas that they feel powerless in and we literally cannot make our kids eat and they know this. Let them choose what they want for dinner (from a list of reasonable options) or let them pick out their own side dish to accompany whatever main dish you are making.
c. Have your kids help (grow and) prepare their own food. When kids feel involved in the process of picking out and making their own food, they are more willing to eat it.
If you have access to a garden, whether that is planter boxes in your backyard with fruits and vegetables, or simply an herb garden in your window sill, have your kids help grow what they eat. This helps them get an idea of how food is grown and makes them a part of the whole process, from planting seeds and seeing things grow, to being able to pick and cook those foods.
Helping prepare foods, such as chopping, mixing, measuring, and pouring, alongside you in the kitchen helps them feel involved in the process, and more comfortable with the foods they are about to eat. Cooking helps kids feel like they are a part of the whole meal time process and being able to eat something that they cooked themselves creates pride and is satisfying and a confidence booster.
Empower your kids to feel like they can make healthy choices for themselves.
7. Encourage adventurous eating. If you are trying to get your kids to branch out from their list of four foods that they will eat, stop buying those foods. You don’t have to get rid of all of their favorites, but if there are certain foods you don’t want them eating, then don’t buy them. Remove the option to fight and help them branch out and try new foods.
a. Stand your ground. I know this sounds simple and is often easier said than done. When we want our kids to eat, and they refuse to eat anything other than what they are demanding (i.e. chicken nuggets or pizza), it’s hard to stand firm. But that is exactly what you need to do. Let them know what their options are. Kids are instinctual and won’t let themselves starve for long. They may skip a meal or two in defiance, but if they are hungry enough they will eat and they will eat what is available. I know it’s hard to watch your kid not eat but it’s also hard to watch them only eat things that aren’t healthy or nutritious day in and day out too. Their hunger strike won’t last long and if you can stick it out, you and your kids will be thankful later on.
Picky eaters come in all shapes, sizes, and ages, but it’s never too late, or too early, to start incorporating healthier habits into your kids eating and encouraging them to step out of their comfort zones and try new things. Be persistent and empower your kids to make their own healthy choices to set them up for success in the future.
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